Unfortunately for Michael Moore, the best title for his new film, Conspiracy Theory, had already been taken, so he had to settle for Fahrenheit 9/11. Moore’s new documentary is all about a vast right wing conspiracy right from the start. The initial scenes set the tone for the film as we are introduced to how the state government of Florida managed to skew the voting results in favor of Bush.

The next hour of the film consists of a major finger pointing episode that ends up pointing to nothing in particular. What exactly Moore’s trying to say is extremely vague. He points to old connections that Bush had with some Saudi businessmen who own companies in the states that produce tanks. So we’re supposed to believe that, because of these connections, Bush has gone to war to make a bit of money for his friends?

It gets worse. I was never exactly sure what the association was, but allegedly Bush also has some remote connections with some relatives of Osama bin Ladan – relatives who have pretty much disowned Osama from the family. To suggest that Bush, the bin Ladans, and the Saudi businessmen were all in on 9/11 to make a few bucks is beyond ridiculous. What’s sillier is that Moore has absolutely nothing in terms of evidence. To make these kind of accusations based on some stretched speculations is simply embarrassing.

I have to admit that, despite their non sequitur logic, some sequences were rather entertaining. Much in the style of “The Daily Show”, Moore presents a handful of clips where Bush is caught off guard or a sound bite is played out of context. But Fahrenheit’s humor really doesn’t hold much more weight than what we usually get on “The Daily Show”: the constant flow of cheap jibes in what is supposed to be serious reporting seriously undermines its own position.

The latter half of the film is an attack on war itself, as if we were all ignorant as to the horrors of war. We talk to soldiers who are immaturely bloodthirsty, soldiers who don’t want to be there at all, we watch a soldier’s mother getting phone calls about the death of her son, etc. Terrible, it’s true, but you could say the exact same thing about the revolutionary war, the civil war, or any other war in the history of the world for that matter. The fact that war is an ugly thing does not in itself mean that the war is not justified.

Moore still makes the time to return to another government conspiracy, this one the silliest of all. Later citing an elitist prejudice, Moore claims the government has been specifically targeting lower class neighborhoods in its recruiting efforts. Well of course it has. The kids in the wealthier areas usually have career and educational plans. They recruit the lower class simply because that’s what’s most successful. Yet Moore insists that The Man is keeping the poor man down.

If everything this film seems to be saying is true, if there really is a Bush-led government conspiracy to keep us at war for oil and power, if Bush really was in on 9/11 and has been secretly orchestrating all major terrorist events around the world, then Moore has presented a ground breaking discovery.

If that’s not the case, however, then watching this film has convinced me all the more that the war was indeed justified. My question is, is this all that Moore’s got? He’s got two hours to convince us that we shouldn’t have gone to war and this shoddy reporting was all he was able to come up with? Doesn’t make sense.

In the midst of all the babble, Moore’s strongest argument is that Bush likes to play golf – he must be evil.

Year: